Have you ever posted something on social media and then kept checking for likes, comments, or shares?
I’ll admit it—I’ve been there.
Social media is a powerful tool for connection, but sometimes, without realizing it, we can start seeking approval more than genuine interaction.
And the tricky part?
Some behaviors that seem harmless can actually make us come across as desperate for validation.
The good news is, once you recognize these patterns, you can start using social media in a way that feels more authentic—both to yourself and to others.
So, let’s take a look at seven social media habits that might be giving off the wrong impression (and what to do instead).
1) Constantly posting about every little thing
Ever feel the urge to share every meal, every workout, every random thought that pops into your head?
It’s great to let people into your life, but when you’re posting non-stop, it can start to feel less like sharing and more like seeking validation.
The truth is, not everything needs an audience. When you post constantly, it can come across as trying too hard to prove something—whether it’s how productive, exciting, or even just how “normal” your life is.
Instead, try focusing on quality over quantity. Share moments that truly matter to you, not just because you feel like you need to stay visible.
2) Deleting posts if they don’t get enough likes
I used to do this all the time.
I’d post a picture or a thought, check back a little later, and if it didn’t get enough likes, I’d delete it.
It felt harmless at the time—like I was just curating my feed—but honestly, I was more worried about how others saw me than whether I actually liked what I shared.
Looking back, I realized this habit made me dependent on external approval. If I needed a certain number of likes to feel good about my own post, was I really posting for myself at all?
Now, I try to share things because I want to, not because I think they’ll perform well.
And if a post doesn’t get much engagement? I leave it up anyway—because not everything needs validation to be valuable.
3) Fishing for compliments with vague or dramatic posts
There was a time when I’d post things like “Ugh, today has been the worst…” or “I guess some people just don’t appreciate honesty.”
No details. No context. Just enough mystery to make people ask, “What happened?” or “Are you okay?”
And when the comments rolled in, it felt good—like I was being seen, like people cared. But the truth? I wasn’t looking for real connection. I was looking for validation.
The problem with this kind of posting is that it doesn’t actually solve anything. It might get attention in the moment, but it also makes people feel like they have to chase after you to find out what’s wrong. And over time, that can push people away.
If you really need support, reach out directly to a friend who will genuinely listen. It’s a lot more meaningful than waiting for likes and comments to fill the void.
4) Over-editing photos to look “perfect”
I used to spend way too much time tweaking my photos before posting them.
Smoothing out my skin, adjusting the lighting just right, even subtly reshaping things here and there. It wasn’t extreme, but it was enough to make me feel like the real me wasn’t quite good enough to be seen as I was.
The likes and compliments felt nice—until I realized they weren’t really for me. They were for a version of me that didn’t actually exist.
Social media makes it easy to fall into this trap, but the more we edit ourselves into perfection, the more we reinforce the idea that we need to. And honestly, it’s exhausting.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to post a great photo, but when every picture is carefully altered to hide what makes you human, it sends a message—not just to others, but to yourself—that you have something to prove.
5) Sharing every achievement, big or small
Did you know that studies show people who constantly post about their successes are often liked less by their peers?
I get it—when something good happens, you want to share it. And you should!
But when every little win becomes a post, it can start to feel less like celebrating and more like seeking validation.
I used to post about every accomplishment, thinking it would inspire others or show how hard I was working. But deep down, I wasn’t just sharing—I was looking for reassurance that I was doing enough.
The truth is, real confidence doesn’t come from likes or comments. It comes from knowing what you’ve achieved, even if no one else is watching.
6) Obsessing over who views or interacts with your posts
I used to check who watched my stories, who liked my posts, and who didn’t.
If someone I expected to engage didn’t show up, I’d wonder if they were upset with me or if I was somehow less important to them than I thought.
But here’s something I’ve realized—people are busy. They have their own lives, their own worries, and sometimes, they’re just scrolling without thinking too much about it. It’s rarely personal.
Tying your self-worth to social media engagement is exhausting. Friendships and connections aren’t measured by likes or views—they’re built through real conversations, shared moments, and mutual understanding.
Instead of focusing on who didn’t engage with your post, focus on the people who show up for you in real life. That’s where the real validation comes from.
If a post did well, I felt great. If it didn’t, I felt invisible.
It’s easy to let social media dictate how we feel about ourselves, but the moment we do, we give away our power.
Likes, comments, and shares aren’t a measure of our worth. They’re just numbers on a screen—fleeting, unpredictable, and never a true reflection of who we are.
The way you see yourself should never depend on how others react online.
The bottom line
If you recognized yourself in any of these behaviors, you’re not alone. Social media has a way of pulling us into patterns we don’t even realize we’ve fallen into.
But here’s the thing—your worth isn’t measured by likes, comments, or how often people engage with your posts. You don’t need constant validation to be valuable.
Instead of chasing approval, try shifting your focus to sharing what truly matters to you—without worrying about how it will be received. The more you lean into authenticity, the more fulfilling your online (and offline) interactions will become.
At the end of the day, real confidence doesn’t come from social media. It comes from knowing who you are, even when no one is watching.
